(Precious: Jan. 31st, 2001- April 22nd, 2009)

Saying goodbye to a loved one is never easy; it can be equally as hard to
not get that closure. On the 22nd, I went to school like normal and two hours later I found out that our beloved ferret Precious had to be put down. She had suffered from Adrenal Disease for two years and was also recently diagnosed with Insulinoma. At 8 years old, she lived a long and happy life. Unfortunately, she had to be put down due to a freak accident that happened in her cage- it wasn't because of her old age or health concerns.

To say the least, this month has been awful. It's like a domino effect where one thing bad happens to set forth a motion of everything else crashing after it. It's been awhile since I've socialized with anyone because I just don't feel like it; I'd rather be alone when things are going sour and despite knowing that it's never healthy for me to do that, I'm not really caring much at the moment. I'm still in shock over a few things, Precious included, and I'm scared how I'll be emotionally once I settle into a state of acceptance... or, well, acknowledging that some things are permanent.

What I am doing is keeping occupied in my work. I hope for my memoir to be published by the end of June. It's a huge risk financially and emotionally but it's something I need to do for myself, and other people. I'm in the first stage of editing with nearly half of the book edited for basic grammar/ spelling, but the first stage is usually longer than the 2nd stage so I hope to have everything completed and submitted to print by mid- May. I was also contacted by a documentary crew in Florida and I don't know where that may go, but I do know I cannot leave the province (or country, rather) because of my expired passport and I'm in school straight through until Christmas Break.

Not much else... I'm sleepless at 5am with thoughts doing cartwheels around my head and I just can't keep up.

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